Hello, my friend!
I’m back with another India post! :) As I mentioned in my last post, I went to India this year with the hope of finding myself a guru for Yoga.
It was a very slim hope because I didn’t know where I would find someone or how I would just stumble across the right person, but with India being the birthplace of Yoga, I was truly hoping to find a knowledgeable Yogi who would be willing to teach me the path of Yoga.
Against the odds, I did find that Yogi, and along with guiding me on my path, he also changed my perception of spirituality and the Yogic path.
So, where does this story start? In Varanasi, the oldest city and one of the most spiritual cities in India.
After leaving Kolkata with a clean slate, my dad and I landed in Varanasi at the Katia Baba Ashram. My /my parents’ guruji (spiritual guide) is a Katia Baba, so with his invitation, we found ourselves staying in the ashram during our time in Varanasi.
The ashram experience was very unique for me because it was a very unique ashram. Because of its location, the ashram walls border a shallow stream of garbage flowing from the trash center right across the street. The smell of the trash permeates the air within the ashram walls, hitting your nose as you eat or as you wander the halls and temple area. Because of the way it was built and designed, there isn’t much light, so initially, the walls in the entrance seemed to close in on us and seemed very intimidating. And unfortunately, the ashram wasn’t well-maintained, so that first night, my dad and I were trekking through the streets looking for new linen and bathroom cleaning supplies, so we could make our room comfortable for our few days there.
Despite the negatives, however, it did not take long to feel the welcoming, warm nature of the people living in the ashram. Many of them were young boys, students at the ashram school, who were helping run the ashram and rotated temple duties. Their shy, curious, smiling faces along with the Maharaji’s warmth and friendliness made staying at the ashram every bit worthwhile. I got the chance to practice my Hindi (which is still…. very rough), and more importantly, I got to talk to Maharaji about all sorts of things. The most important of which was my path in Yoga.
The stars truly aligned, as they say, because it turns out that my Guruji attended the same university as one of Varanasi’s biggest Yogis. So, as I spoke with Maharaji about my interest in Yoga, he immediately remembered Gurudev (what I call this Yogi) and started looking to see if he could get his number. By the next morning, I had an appointment with Gurudev for the evening, so that we could meet.
Speaking with Gurudev that first day filled my heart with so much joy and hope and excitement that it’s hard to describe. Firstly, because I was finally meeting a Yogi, not just in name but in practice. Secondly, because his words and teachings were aligning with all the things that I had started to piece together about Yoga from my YTT and the Geeta and through reading the Yogic texts. Lastly, because in true guru-shishya relation, he agreed to teach me and I to learn. With only one other free evening on our trip, I only met once more with Gurudev before taking off to the next destination, but the time and the attention he gave during that Yoga lesson is something I’m truly grateful for. And I now have a guru to teach and guide me from abroad.
To give a bit of background on Gurudev, he runs a school in Varanasi and practices Yoga daily at 4am in the morning at one of the local ghats (ghat = “a broad flight of steps leading down to the bank of a river in India”). In addition to his Yoga school and life as a Yogi, he’s also a professor at a University and has a family.
Having a guru who is also a householder completely changed my perception of spirituality and Yoga.
Since I started dating my boyfriend back in 2021, I’ve been conflicted with where my spirituality fits in with my relationship and my career.
When I dove deep into Yoga in 2021 and was truly starting to feel the profound spiritual effects of Yoga, I was alone in Virginia. Apart from my very lax workday and talking with my parents, my whole life was dedicated to Yoga and living Ayurvedically.
But a mere couple months after our relationship began, I saw the unbreakable peace and inner knowing within me was dwindling. As a result, I’ve had this perception for the longest time that with a partner by my side and a more demanding job and work schedule, I won’t be able to go back to that depth of spirituality because I no longer have that same time and have more maya (loosely translates to illusory attachments).
However, shortly after I started dating, I also got into a prestigious fellowship in my industry, and so, I started straying in terms of philosophy, namely diving into manifestation, among many other things.
When you read the texts or you speak with a guru, there is one thing that stays consistent: when one comes to a certain depth of spirituality, there is a turning point; at that pivotal point, either one continues down to a deeper understanding and exploration of Self, or one begins seeing the effects of their spiritual powers (inadvertent manifestation is one of those effects) and returns back to materialistic things, or one gets confused with the different philosophies as they explore more and loses their way. That is why, in Vedic life, the guru is so important; without a guru to guide, it is easy for one to lose their path.
Without a guru to guide me at that point in my spiritual journey, I strayed and lost my way. And since my pivotal point coincided with being in a new relationship, in addition to recognizing my deviation to additional philosophies, I thought a key part of losing my way was because I had started increasing my attachments and becoming more entangled with another person.
This led to a feeling of deep conflict because I felt like even if I continued with my spirituality, I would hit a plateau after which I would essentially be choosing my career/household life over my spirituality just by virtue of pursuing a career and family. The fact that most enlightened individuals that I have been exposed to, whether in India or otherwise, are celibate and live in spiritual institutions didn’t help this conflict within me.
It was not until almost the end of my lesson with Gurudev that I learned he was a householder, and that unlocked something deep within me. Earlier on in the conversation, I had learned his guru, too, was a householder, but after having spoken with him for hours and learning Yoga from him, realizing that he is a Yogi who is able to balance his spiritual journey with career and family made that connection suddenly tangible and possible for me.
And after sitting with him for so long, and expressing that I have been in a confused, lost state in my Yoga journey, trying to find my way back to that deep spiritual state I was once in, I was finally given a path back to it by Gurudev. For me, this is a beacon of hope, a guiding light back to my Self.
I also don’t believe it is a coincidence that it was in Varanasi, the city said to have been built by Lord Shiva, the Adiyogi (”first Yogi” and father of Yoga), that I met Gurudev.
I had no plans to go to Varanasi until over a week into my 4.5 week trip, and quite frankly, I had never thought of going to Varanasi before then. I had been thinking of going to Rishikesh, the birthplace of Yoga, but something just wasn’t sitting with me about that. It was not until a chance conversation with my Uncle and getting this gut feeling that Varanasi was the right place to go that my dad and I booked our tickets and made our plans.
Turns out, it really was the right place to go, and my ultimate guru - the Adiyogi - was guiding my Yogic journey.
Shreya
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